Many have found success in the entertainment business or in fashion, while others dance cabaret or accept lower level work so that they are able to live their lives in the open. Though kathoeys have experienced some prestige in the past, they still face many struggles in everyday life. Kathoey cannot officially change their birth sex on birth certificates or passports, meaning they cannot marry someone of the same sex (even if they identify with a different gender). Kathoey have not yet attained equal status with those who are not transgender, and restrictions come with the identity. However, kathoeys are still only begrudgingly accepted in many corners of Thai society. Thai Buddhism does not specifically regard homosexuality as a sin and has no specific prohibitions regarding the orientation. Kathoeys are numerous in Thailand and are seemingly accepted by society, not only in the cities but in the countryside as well. Personally most of kathoeys prefer to call themselves "a transformed goddess" or "a second type of woman". The term is used rather loosely at times and can be used to refer to any male who possesses traditionally 'feminine' qualities. The term can also be meant as an insult, especially to those who are trying to alter or openly express their identity, as it suggests that they are still men who are merely dressed as women. Due to this term becoming so broad, many choose to use the English word to explain a homosexual male dressing as a woman as a "ladyboy". This term can now also be used to refer to any male homosexual and was originally used to refer to intersex people. Though the term is often translated as "transgender", the term is rarely used in Thailand. Kathoeys Īlthough the terms " kathoey" or "ladyboy" are rather ambiguous, simply put, both terms refer to someone assigned male at birth, who dresses as and adopts the mannerisms and identity of a woman. Adam Īn Adam is a male who is attracted to Toms. Toms may seek dees or toms (in which case they may be referred to as Tom Gay Kings), toms may be 1-way or 2-way. The same terms king and queen are used for male homosexual roles. Conversely, the terms king and queen refer to active or receptive roles, yet can also be situational rather than an identity. A 1-way tom would see it fit to take care of the female both materially (pay for everything) and psychologically, but not accept the same in return. Particular among them are one-way and two-way, which refer to the perceived permanent sexual roles of giver and receiver and giver, respectively, but taking on a broader meaning than merely sex. Within the female community, there are roles which complicate identity. a woman who is attracted to the traditional gender adhering Thai female. ![]() Lesbian Ī lesbian in Thai culture differs from the West, i.e. Tom Gay Ī Tom Gay is a Tom who is attracted to all 3 types of women, heterosexual women, Toms, and Dees. In this way tom-dee partnerships can be invisible to the wider society. However, minor displays of affection, such as hand-holding, between same sex individuals is considered the norm. Heterosexual public displays of affection are frowned upon in Thai culture. The only difference between dees and traditional females is that dee often engage in relationships with toms. A dee will look, act, and speak in a manner congruent with Thai female gender norms. ![]() ![]() The "dee" (ดี้), from the English word lady, is a homosexual (or bisexual) female who follows outward Thai gender norms. According to Ara Wilson, a tom will use male speech terms, especially the old, now-crude pronouns goo (Thai: กู) for "I", and mueng (Thai: มึง) for "you". Toms dress in men's clothing-slacks, sandals, and loose fitting button-down shirts. Women usually wear skirts in Thailand, and in many government offices skirts are compulsory and pants suits banned. Toms wear short hair, a deviation from Thai tradition which has prized long hair as a sign of feminine beauty since a Europeanization of customs during the Victorian era (while short hair was the norm for Central Thai women until c. She may not identify as a lesbian, but she may be perceived as one by others. Tom-Dee identity Tom identity Ī "tom" (ทอม), from the English word tomboy, is a female who dresses, acts, and possibly speaks in a masculine fashion. This means he seeks a traditional Thai female, but does not accept as a sexual or marriage partner the other female gender identities listed below.Ī heterosexual female refers to the traditional female who seeks the traditional heterosexual male ( man) in Thai society. Note this may differ from Western ideas of heterosexual male, to which lesbian sex has been eroticized. Heterosexual/Traditional Male Ī heterosexual male is the only sexuality, which refers not just to physical sex but gender identity as well.
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